the Vicar's official web site
Punk's Diary
Super Comic Convention

I've been crawling around on my hands and knees building display boards for the London Super Comic Convention, which starts tomorrow. Silly me - I thought I was a studio engineer not a carpenter (not knocking carpenters, who have far more useful skills than me, as I've spent the day discovering).

All ready for our big day out in the city - almost tempted to buy myself a Spiderman costume. Almost.

Posted on - 14 Mar 14




News Post
Facebook Launch

We have finally launched on Facebook. Ben, Art God, has designed some auitable pages, and we now have pages for The Vicar Chronicles and also The Vicar Chronicles Graphic Novels on Facebook.

Please go like them!

Posted on - 11 Feb 2014




The Vicar's Diary
Songbook The Second

Yes, yes, another album beckons. That wonderfully naive moment, when you begin with a blank canvas, and recreate that childish joy of throwing colour against an empty canvas (although hopefully now tempered by a modicum of experience and good taste).

First up for the Vicarious treatment is "The Reggae Song", a favourite from the Tall Pointy One's college days, followed by Under My Wing, which will need a special singer - maybe Passenger, as managed by David and Tim at IE. Although I suspect they will advise their artist to go nowhere near our left-field projects.

I have also found my feet tapping away to the chorus of The Rainbow in 5/4 (more accurately 4/4, with an extra beat's rest), so we shall see where that may go. Onward!

Posted on - 6 Jan 14




News Post
Katgirl's Ghost and the Disappearing Discs

Punk Sanderson does it again! Another Vicar Chronicle has slipped effortlessly from his inventive pen.

A rockstar whose CDs go into the shops but never come out (but aren't there any more either), a goth girl with a ghost in her bedroom (and one really big surprise), and Punk's very own dotcom start-up.

Sounds like chaos as usual!

Posted on - 30 Oct 13




Punk's Diary
Back in the broom cupboard

Time for a new Vicar Chronicle apparently - so The Vicar has locked me back in the broom cupboard until it's finished.

God! That means a new plot, new characters, new jokes. What's wrong with the ones I've already written I ask. Hercule Poirot only ever had one plot (variations of).

btw. thanks for the various email of support. They make a lot of difference. Always good to know there are a few Punksters out there, who may actually read my drivel... (washing my mouth out with soap) - not drivel...fine literature - coming to a bookstore near you (hopefully)!

Posted on - 15 Aug 13




News Post
Album of the month in Italy

The Vicar's Songbook #1 has been made ALBUM OF THE MONTH by Rockerilla magazine, hailing it as "the epitome of the English sound" and "an incredible acoustic light orchestra" in the manner of "George Martin, Phil Spector, Van Dyke Parks and Joe Boyd".

Not to be outdone, Italy's Jam Magazine gives a glowing four star review, describing The Vicar's album as "Delizioso".

The Italians like their Vicars!

Posted on - 23 Jul 13




News Post
The Vicar launches in Japan

Not content with his recent success in London, The Vicar is launching in Japan. Ben Singleton (artist of the Graphic Novels) and his Dad, The Tall Pointy One are flying to Japan for a gruelling round of interviews, dinners, cocktail parties and first class plane travel. Hard work, but someone has to do it.

In fact, there are rumours that the Tall Pointy One treats his son in the same way as the Vicar treats Punk - making him fly in the back of the plane, while he himself reclines in luxury in the pointy end of the plane (maybe that's why he's called the tall Pointy One). Your intrepid reporter will try to find to find out if there is truth in the rumour.

Posted on - 1 June 13




Punk's Diary
Fabulastic Surround Playback at Dolby HQ

Woah! The playback of The Vicar songbook #1 was, well, just fabulastic (The Vicar didn't attend the playback, of course, but what would you expect).

Our compere for the day was the Tall Pointy One (that would be David Singleton to anyone who hasn't followed The Vocar's diaries) - and also JJ from Dolby - who described the album as the future of High Definition Music. Maybe The Vicar's not just a pretty face after all. If I work out how, I will upload some photos of all the various celebrities and super models who attended (the invitations also promised Susho on Naked Dancers, but i didn't spot either, although there was plenty of beer to quaff)

Anyway, I crept in, and it was fab do. So the album's well and truly launched. God bless this ship and all who sail in her.

Posted on - 4 May 13




News Post
Phill Savidge Joins the team

Phill Savidge, known for his work with 90s Britpop, and more recently with Michael Nyman, The Stranglers and Barenaked Ladies has accepted the task of spreading The Vicar gospel.

Advance copies of the Songbook #1 CD/DVDA package are even now winging their way to music editors and other unsuspecting journalists.

Anyone needing further details can get in touch with the Phill Savidge PR agency at www.phillsavidge.com.

Posted on - 5 April 13




The Vicar's Diary
Dolby Playback 30th April

Our man at Dolby, the irreplaceable JJ, has confirmed that they wish to host a surround sound demonstration of Songbook #1 in London on the 30th April. Hallelujah!

The Tall Pointy One at DGM is currently wrestling with the names on the guest list. (God forbid that the musicians who made the music should be deemed more worthy than the honourable members of the Fourth Estate and their Royal Charter). I understand that Donbledore is even hoping to fly in from Seattle.

Hopefully some seats will be reserved for true audients from The Vicar faithful, wishing to be present for the music - no doubt, Punk will, in due course, find a competition or Sorting Hat for choosing deserving suspects.

Posted on - 18 Mar 13




News Post
Drummer Joke APP

The Vicar is moving into the word of APPs - starting with an APP to house all the drummer jokes that feature on this site, and which Punk has been tweeting so successfully (If you can call 500 followers success).

Any followers keen on helping to build an App should throw their virtual hat into the ring by contacting dgm@dgmlive.com.

Posted on - 4 Mar 13




The Vicar's Diary
DVDA Master - Finally

Neil Wilkes at Opus Productions, long-suffering hero, has finally completed The Vicar Songbook DVDA.

The first draft was done before Christmas, but this is a disc of mind-numbing complexity (the menus alone are revolutionary) and each small amendment requires a new series of beta checks and test masters.

The Vicarage now boasts its own Bluray/DVDA player courtesy of Cambridge Audio (actually not "courtesy of", if that implies a freebie, as I walked into a shop and purchased it) so I have even been able to enjoy it in the peace of my own inner sanctum.

Now, we need to find a way of presenting this wonderfulness to a cruel, uncaring world.

Posted on - 28 Feb 13




Punk's Diary
Fart For Your Rights (Famous Speeches in History)

I've just uploaded the third video in the Fart For Your Rights series - "Famous Speeches in History".

We invoke the spirit (who knows, maybe even the humour) of the backs-to-the-wall, David-against-Goliath master himself, Winston Churchill, in our fight to call the major Record Labels to account.

The next lines of this famous speech about "the New World saving the Old" are also prophetically (profartically?) appropriate.

So there it is - with the greatest respect and in the worst possible taste (what else did you expect).

Posted on - 14 Feb 13




News Post
Ground-breaking multimedia project challenges the Music Industry

A sleepy village in Wiltshire seems an unlikely place for a media revolution – even if it does involve earl grey tea-drinking Vicars, retiring rock stars and (in a twist worthy of Monty Python) a video-blogging flatulent drummer.

The intent of THE VICAR CHRONICLES, based around the exploits of the legendary music producer, The Vicar, and released this week by DGM Ltd, could not be more simple: to expose the ill-treatment of musicians and artists at the hands of the ‘evil empire’ of the music industry. An industry, in the words of guitarist Robert Fripp, “founded on exploitation, oiled by deceit, riven with theft and fuelled by greed.”

Even the copyright statement is a challenge to the status quo: “DGM Ltd accepts no reason for artists to give away the copyright interests in their work by virtue of a ‘common practice’ which is out of tune with the time, was always questionable and is now indefensible.”

No revolution would be complete without a street protest – and Punk Sanderson, author of The Vicar Chronicles, recently took his protest to the London offices of Universal Music Group, the largest record label in the world, releasing a Youtube video of himself holding placards and breaking wind in protest at each broken contract.

“It’s like the OCCUPY movement only smellier. We’ve called bankers, politicians and ‘phone-hackers to account – now it’s time to blow the wind of change at the major record labels. They trample over musicians’ rights and rather than owning up and offering fair settlement, reach for expensive lawyers. It would cost over £300,000 to fight them in the courts – who’s got that kind of money?”

It has taken ten years for The VICAR CHRONICLES to see the light of day. It is only now possible due to recent changes in the media landscape.

“A few years ago, a project of this magnitude – involving novels, graphic novels, audiobooks, videobooks, film, albums, even a potential TV series – could only have existed with the unlikely support, given the content, of a major label and book publisher,” co-creator, David Singleton, explains. “Now it took just two meetings. One with Robert Kondrck, co-founder of iTunes, who flew into London, and the other with Dan Slater, the head of Kindle at Amazon in Seattle.”

The Vicar Chronicles, by Punk Sanderson, are released through Amazon and iTunes. ‘Sherlock Holmes meets Spinal Tap’, an ingenious series of whodunits set in the music industry, blurring the lines between fact and fiction.

Posted on - 28 Jan 13




The Vicar's Diary
FART FOR YOUR RIGHTS

Record company breaks contract.
Artist breaks wind.

How can one small, mobile and not-very-intelligent unit fight the blast-door of lawyers that protect the world's largest media company?

Many musicians and artists have faced the same problem, but few have worked their butts off quite like this to find a solution - fart outside the offices of their nemesis and post the video on YouTube.

Punk Sanderson, author of a series of semi-fictional exposes of the music industry, has filmed his protest: Fart For Your Rights!

"It's like the Occupy Movement, only smellier. We've called bankers, politicians and 'phone-hackers to account - now it's time for major record labels. They trample over musicians' rights and rather owning up and offering fair settlement, reach for expensive lawyers. It would cost over £300,000 to fight them in the courts - who's got that kind of money?"

So, armed with a battery of slogans - "Fart For Farts Sake," "All You Need Is Wind," "With A Little Fart From Your Friends" - the intention is to encourage Dinosaur Inc to own up, get ethical and improve business practices.

"The major record labels are happy enough chasing college kids who infringe their own copyrights. This campaign blows them towards taking their own copyright abuse seriously. Any artist can join the protest, get the iFart app on their 'phone, and blast away in meetings with their record label. Or just trigger it anyway. We are on the scent of something big."

All Punk's found-sounds are of organic origin.

Posted on - 13 Jan 13




Punk's Diary
All you Need is Wind

Just when you think that you have done it all - The Vicar has another "bright idea". This one involves me standing outside UMG's offices in Kensington, and waving placards while pretending - wait for it Punksters, you'll never guess - yes, to fart (thankfully those are being "overdubbed" later - I'm not sure who is supplying the smelly sound effects).

His Hairyness, in his role as scourge of the record labels (I assume at least some of you have read The Vicar Chronicles) has decided to join DGM and King Crimson's ongoing campaign to persuade Sanctuary/UMG to take their copyright abuses more seriously.

Hopefully, it won't be landing me a jail. Hey ho. It won't be the first time.

Posted on - 5 Jan 13




The Vicar's Diary
Record label Breaks Contract. Artist Breaks Wind

I continue to follow the ongoing dispute between King Crimson and UMG with astonishment. It is sadly quite easy to believe that a record label can be this incompetent (repeatedly selling downloads and stock to which they do not own the rights, "forgetting" to request a license for the inclusion of tracks on compilations, failure to pay royalties etc etc). It is, however, difficult to undertand their shame-faced refusal to apologize and offer a reasonable settlement.

At the beginning of this dispute, had they apologized, offered a reasonable explanation, and a small but meaningful sum (perhaps £5,000) - much of this dispute would have long been settled. Instead of which, they offered no explanations,. no apologies and paltry sums - with no justification as to why these should have been correct. If a company of UMG's stature does not instantly offer £5,000 or even £10,000, then they do not take their infringement seriously.

So perhaps this is a case for The Vicar.

I have been hearing strange eruptions from one of the DGM offices - and these, combined with a video by Punk - may yet force the two parties into serious talks. To misquote Monty Python, It is time for a campaign in which "we fart in your particular direction".

Posted on - 3 Jan 13




The Vicar's Diary
Dolby Surround Sound

Excitement, Excitement! Dolby Audio have chosen Songbook#1 as their surround-sound demonstration music - thus reaffirming my belief in their excellent tastes. We have met with JJ (their "evangelist") in their Soho square offices, and are planning joint playbacks in London, LA, Seattle and New York.

All the acts of heroism by the Tall Pointy One and Neil Wilkes in making a defining surround sound experience may now receive the rewards that they deserve.

Posted on - 20 Dec 12




Punk's Diary
Published Author!

Yes, Punksters. I am now a published author. eBooks on Amazon and iTunes, and real books sitting on a pallet waiting to go out (I've fondled them).

Promotional emails have gone out (if you're reading this and haven't been spammed then something's gone wrong). Who knows, I may even have sold a copy! (not holding my breath on that score).

So thanks to everyone for getting us here. And on with the next bit. And the bit after that.

Posted on - 7 Dec 12




News Post
OCTOBER RELEASE DATE

If there is Music Olympics (yes, yes, we know there was lots of music, much of the ageing variety, at the Olympics) then Sean Fitzpatrick would be competing for gold. In the "slowly pushing an album up a mountain until it finally rolls down the other side" category he has no peers. The date is set. October the something or other. Tie a knot in your hankerchief.

Posted on - 1 Nov 12




The Vicar's Diary
EMI meets its Waterloo

I visited EMI today in the company of the Tall Pointy One. Rather sad - The cafe is adorned with posters of The Beatles and Pink Floyd (all bands from before Punk was born - now tragically with dead members, which, of course, he never likes). And to think that even these blasts from the past will now be owned by the French!

Posted on - 10 Oct 12




The Vicar's Diary
Again!!

Have I really been so foolish as to entrust my future well-being to a sexually incontinent imbecile, who has lost my video camera...again!! Hmmmppff! Those familiar with the all too real stories hidden within the First two Chronicles, will know that he has already lost one of my cameras, not once, but twice. Does he mayhap have a flourishing secondhand camera business on Ebay, of which I am blissfully unaware.

Further research is clearly needed.

Posted on - 5 Oct 12




The Vicar's Diary
Delays in Transmission

My apologies to those who have had the rhythm of their lives disrupted by Punk's incompetence - welcome to my daily burden. Who needs maggots writhing in their undergarments when Punk Sanderson is so readily (and cheaply) available. He assures me that, having solved his hardware problems (a flagrant attempt at a pay-rise) the next episode will be posted on Tuesday, and that they will continue bi-weekly thereafter.

I therefore crave your patience for a few more days.

Posted on - 20 Sep 12




News Post
The Mysterious Case of Billy's G String

In an unexpected fit of generosity - The Cruel, Heartless, Venal Leader... yes, The Vicarious Highness himself... has agreed to allow Punk to show "The Mysterious Case of Billy's G String" before reaching his target of 10,000 Facebook fans of THE FREE PUNK SANDERSON CAMPAIGN.

Catch it Three Times a Week - Every Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

Tell your friends. Tell your girlfriend. Tell your Mother in law.

Posted on - 5 Sep 2012




Punk's Diary
What's on the menu today?!

Yes, Punksters. Videos are on the menu. If you stroll along to the video page, you will now find a select button, which brings up a menu where you can select a multitude of cinematographic delights and wonderments (to steal a phrase from my Lord and Master. All bow down).

Hope you like it!

Posted on - 6 Aug 12




News Post
Videos hiding

Thanks to those who said they didn't find the drop down list on the video page (although if they didn't find it, how did they know it was there??!!)

The design team (all one of me) is beavering away looking for a better version. In the meantime...there is a list if you look.

Posted on - 20 Jul 12




Punk's Diary
Is this cool or what?!

Hey hey hey. It actually works! You can click on things and stuff happens - sometimes even the right things!

And you all thought I was an utter f**wit, didn't you?! Applause and adulation gratefully received.

Although I can't steal all the credit - a very big thank you to Mr TX for all his programming genius, without which this would still be little bits of paper cutouts, being rescued from the hoover, after a bit of an accident on my bedroom floor.

Posted on - 5 Jul 12




The Vicar's Diary
Happy Birthday

So - the day finally dawns and thevicar.com creeps, blinking, into the daylight.

Punk has taken the work of one of the greatest human minds, Tim Berners Lee, inventor of the internet, combined it with six pages of code written by a programming genius at MIT in the USA - and used it... to make a pair of underpants scroll up and down! One of mankinds greatest achievements, I would say.

I also applaud his desire to replace the ubiquitous star rating with one based on pints of beer (English pints not European litres, I trust).

As ever, of course, he fails to do the blindingly obvious (such as make "The Store" work) - so sales of Vicarious Barbie Dolls will have to wait for another day.

But, we are begun. Where will it lead, I wonder?

Posted on - 19 Jun 12




News Post
The Vicar site is launched

The Vicar site opens for business (well, actually everything except "business" as Punk has finished the store yet). Bang on it, try not to break it and tell us what you think.

Be gentle!

Posted on - 4 Jun 12

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